Stark Raving Mad
by xgossamerstars
Summary: Iruka concluded that the only reason people feared Hatake Kakashi was because the man was mad. Stark...raving...mad. KakaIru if you squint.


**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.**

**A/N: Yes, I know. The first line is ridiculous.**

xXx

"Kakashi-san...are you reading **porn**?"

Lazily, the jounin raised his eye above the line of a particularly interesting page of Icha Icha Paradise. The accuser was vaguely familiar as Naruto's former Academy sensei, and it took a moment for Kakashi to remember that the chuunin was a sort of adoptive parent to Naruto.

"Yo." Kakashi greeted at length. He lowered his eyes back to his por--er, romance novel.

The Academy teacher suddenly became flustered. What did he think he was **doing**, walking up to Hatake Kakashi, **Sharingan no Kakashi**, and asking such a question? He glanced down at the man seated beneath the tree--Hatake Kakashi was a legend in his own time, but still..._Baka Iruka. If he's reading that stuff around Naruto, you have a right to know!_

"Gomen nasai, Kakashi-san," Iruka began, bowing slightly. "That was rude of me."

His eye flickered upwards to regard the sensei's face. A blush had crept across his dark cheeks, making the scar across his nose stand out. Upon noticing the scar, Kakashi remembered the man's name: Umino Iruka, chuunin, schoolteacher.

"S'alright," Hatake Kakashi shrugged his broad shoulders. "You need something?"

Iruka stiffened slightly, then blushed even deeper. "Do you...do you read this sort of, ah...novel...around team seven? Around Naruto?"

Kakashi's eye shifted slowly to Iruka's face. "Yeah," he muttered, his typically nonchalant voice somehow managing to sound threatening. "So what if I do?"

At this point, most nin succumbed to the copycat's innate ability to make anyone around him feel ill at ease. Most nin would have mumbled an apology and slipped away, or suddenly "remembered" an "appointment". Most nin would have done anything to escape Sharingan no Kakashi's cool, unsettlining gaze.

Umino Iruka, despite common agreement that he was the most average shinobi in Konoha, was not most nin.

"I'd really rather you not," Iruka replied. "I just...don't think it's good for Naruto to be exposed to that at his age."

Sharingan no Kakashi, taken aback, could only blink owlishly.

Umino Iruka foolishly took Kakashi's blinking stare as anger, and the last thing Iruka wanted was for the fearsome shinobi he'd heard so much about to be angry at him. Still, his concern for the well being of Naruto's innocence could not be so easily pushed aside. He gazed back at the masked man evenly, despite the fear in his chest.

Iruka expected Kakashi to snap at him, in the very least--to tell him to keep his scarred nose out of other people's business. He half expected to be hit with some kind of jutsu. He did **not**, however, expect Kakashi to laugh.

Kakashi was not exactly sure **why** he was laughing. It was a part of the jounin's life to be feared; he was used to being able to frighten off unwanted company with his biting sarcasm and nonchalance. He had deflected questions from the Hokage with little more than an irritated shrug of the shoulders. Everyone knew him--everyone knew what he'd seen--everyone knew what he was capable of. Thus, he was respected, and left alone. Yet it was Umino Iruka, the schoolteacher, the chuunin who hadn't been on a real mission in years who had at last had the balls to stand up to him. Hell, the man had looked him in the eye!

Even as he laughed, the copy-nin couldn't help but feel as if an invisible line had been crossed--a line he'd drawn himself, many years ago.

"Kakashi-san," Iruka began, eyeing the jounin questioningly. "Are you all right?"

As Kakashi's laughter faded away to the occasional chuckle, Iruka concluded that the only reason people feared Hatake Kakashi was because the man was mad.

Stark...

"Ah, Iruka-san, thank you. I needed that," Kakashi pocketed the orange book, the presence of which seemed to irk Iruka. He extended a hand.

Raving...

"Help me up, Iruka-san. I'll discuss Naruto with you over ramen."

Mad.

xXx

**To continue, or not to continue...that is the question.**


End file.
